Dear Jessica Brennan
You know I love our yoga nights, but you need to try harder. Sometimes at work, I feel like I breathe in and don’t breathe out for hours, so the yoga teaching of breathing out twice as long as you breathe in, well that’s good right? But last Tuesday night, I had the giggles. I couldn’t help it and I wanted you to join in. You were uncooperative. I tried to distract you when the teacher left the room for a moment. “Eh-hem”, I said, “cough-cough”, but you just stayed in Shavasana. I scratched my finger nails on my mat repeatedly, but no response, just your peaceful resting pose. How horrible to have a belly full of giggles and no one to share them with! “This is our practice!”, I wanted to shout to the group, “Let’s party!” but eventually I thought I should behave and began the stretching and bending that comes so naturally to you and is about as natural for me as a faux-hawk. I was doing well evicting the snickers from my sphere until the fly came and landed on my face as I was doing the moon salutation. It was stupid in that way flies get this time of year, and I could have easily killed it except I was in yoga and it might have been my grandmother or something. “If only Jessica would look over now,“ I thought, “We would be away with side-splitting laughter – a three part dirga guffaw”, but no, you just elegantly steepled your fingers and brought the moon back down to earth. How disappointing.
Just a warning – next Tuesday I’m bringing a whistle and a tambourine.
Love Mum xo
