Dear Jessica Brennan,
When your Dad’s dad, the great George Brennan was alive, his advice to parents who were trying to micromanage their kids’ lives was, “Oh, get out of their way!”
More than once when your Dad has become over zealous about “helping” you with your life, I have asked him, “What would your dad say?”
He always sheepishly replies, “He would say to get out of her way.”
All parents, at one point or another need to get out of their children’s way, so their offspring can become who they truly are. This isn’t only when kids are tiny either. In fact, it is usually as they grow up.
Sometimes though, we also need to tell other people to get out of our way. This can be done with nicer words than that, but if someone is negative or unsupportive; superior or heavy to be around, find a nice way to tell them to get out of your way. Also, if someone is loving but trying to keep you comfortable or stuck, find a way to explain to them that what you need at the moment is inspiration and ambition, not the “same old”. Don’t let them cast a shadow on you, when what you need is light.
Mostly though, we need to get out of our own way. I find that I get into my own way usually through routine. Watching TV at the same time every night. Eating the same food over and over. Thinking the same thoughts about various scenarios that have me stuck. Judging people or situations without having enough context to actually know that I’m correct. These are a few examples of how we get in our own way.
So parents (talking to myself again), get out of your kids’ way. Dear Jessica, tell your detractors to buzz off and your friends to propel from behind you, not stand in front of you. Make sure you aren’t in anyone else’s way, and to everyone reading? Why not do one thing this week to get out of your own way?
Love,
Mum xo
