Creation or Destruction?

Dear Jessica Brennan,

Every time we criticize someone’s art, we choose destruction.

Every time we put down someone’s work or smoothly gaslight them with an emotional bulldozer, we choose destruction.

When we say, “What was she thinking wearing that dress?” We choose destruction.

When we are rude to a server, belittle a co-worker or patronize when we should recognize, we choose destruction.

Will you choose creation or destruction?

When you compliment someone without adding, “but”, to make yourself feel superior by knocking them down on the back end of the praise.  You choose creation.

When you say to a server, “You were very attentive.” You choose creation.

When you stop to realize that while you’re tired and had a rough day, you’re spouse had a great day and wants to tell you about it, and you actually listen to them.  You choose creation.

When you make something, and feel proud and don’t care if anyone else in the universe likes it, because you do.  That’s brilliant creation. Good for you!

The current climate in our society to me feels like it thrives on destruction.  I feel like we are not going to stop until we have criticized everyone on planet earth for one thing or another.

The armchair YouTube critic who doesn’t like Bruno Mars. The politicians who run on platforms of power, intimidation and catastrophe, the hackers whose entire world revolves around ruining someone else’s work, and the self-help gurus who profit from making us perpetually afraid that we aren’t enough, are all feeding the destructive beast.

Ironically, the person who is most criticized is often talented beyond imagination, smart, kind and funny. This fact though seems to be a very difficult thing for many people to accept let alone celebrate.

In this day of open avenues of communication, the very same critics with so much to say, are totally free to create whatever they want. But they don’t. Why? They are either not in possession of the talent to do so, or they are too busy criticizing to get anything positive created.  

The key to happiness when creating is to deaden the critics blather.

Let’s take Bruno Mars as an example. Before Bruno was popular do you think someone didn’t say to him, “You’re too small, too mixed race, too (fill in the blank)”.  Bruno though did what all passionate people do who want to make their art – successful and otherwise – he ignored the noise of the critics of this world and did it anyway because he is an adult, and an optimist and has chosen to live his life on his own terms not under the microscope of the negative wannabes with YouTube channels who run GoFundMe campaigns to pay their rent instead of getting real jobs creating something good.

He believed in himself and his own worth, and put his efforts into creation rather than the destruction of other people.  He did what felt true to him. He ignored the naysayers, and self-proclaimed experts, and devoted no time to defending a gift that was obvious.

He ignored the din of the ever-reproducing trolls.

The mouthpiece critics struggle to say anything nice because where would the ego-boost be in that? People have the choice every day to either be kind and supportive, or to tear others down. More and more we seem to have lost sight of the simple task to “love one another”.

It all starts in our own backyards. It starts here with me and you. Will we choose creation or destruction?

Love Mum xo