Own it

Dear Jessica Brennan,

I used to think that life was hard.

• It’s hard to save enough money
• It’s hard to lose weight
• It’s hard to make ends meet
• It’s hard to get up when it’s cold and dark in the mornings
• It’s hard to get enough sleep
• It’s hard to make relationships work
• It’s hard to stay motivated
• It’s hard to find time

But then I realized a simple truth.

You have to own it.

• I spent the money
• I ate the donuts
• I ran up the credit cards
• I settled in Canada
• I stayed up and watched Ray Donovan until 3 AM
• I married him
• I took the job
• I sat on Facebook for 3 hours
• I adopted the pet, left the top down on the car, hung clothes on the exercise bike, didn’t clean up after dinner, partied all night, said yes when I should have said no, said no when I should have said yes, didn’t pay attention, obsessed, was unkind, sugar coated it, didn’t ask for help.

Here is something I know to be true. Getting over the hard stuff is impossible if you don’t own your part. Even when the lion’s share of responsibility falls on someone else, if you don’t take your part of it and own it, you won’t get beyond the crisis or unsettled feeling or over the hurdle. You will just whine and blame and make excuses. The missing piece in moving on isn’t the money or the weight or time or the dog. It’s you.

Love Mum xo