Dear Jessica Brennan,
Have you ever had a poignant week? I’m sure you haven’t. I’m sure everything is all roses and rainbows over there in Family Law. This post is not going to give you a giggle, so if that’s what you’re looking for today there’s a great video of pandas and a barrel of leaves circulating on Facebook.
Those who talk about branding will be cringing. “Make them laugh Sharon. Know your audience”. But my brand is me, so this is what you’re getting.
This post is about loss.
I have been a quiet witness to other people’s pain over the last little while and through that time I have been saddened, inspired and awed by the strength of the human spirit.
While this pain was not specifically mine to bear, watching it has been an emotional process and through it I kept saying, “Learn Sharon, learn”.
I watched as people experienced the loss of a loved sister. The loss of what looked to be a miraculously huge career opportunity. The total loss of respect that was already almost gone, but then rushed like a sink unclogging.
Through the bird’s eye view I have had, here is what I noticed.
If you do not have respect, forget it. This loss is non-recoupable with those whom you have offended. It will slowly, seep from your sphere for a long time and then one day there will be a point of no return, the bottom will fall out of everything and all there will be left is a big black hole. The imaginary world you have created for yourself will be charcoal. So be worthy of respect. Tell the truth. Be kind.
When loss occurs on a massive scale, and your hopes and dreams are dashed, profound faith in your own gifts and what you can bring the world, is what will carry you through. Being where you should not be is the biggest clogger of life. No matter how tempting it is to settle, keep your integrity intact and be the open vessel by which your gifts can come to the planet. Be the reason you are here. Find a way.
The smallest things you have to give, can carry huge amounts of love. A favourite ball marker, a Hooters T-shirt, a card. Love is hard sometimes. Love is sitting next to your dying sister day after day. Love in action takes courage. Love is letting your sister have a birthday. It is heroic. It flows back and forth like a fantastic dance. Love.
I know why people make food when their friends experience loss. The need to provide comfort and nurture is intense. With loss comes many lessons on what to do, and what not to do. A new faith in humanity and human kindness and a sharper focus on what is important and on the brevity of life is there to explore. A sense of living fearlessly emerges.
In the last ten days I have recalled that clarity I had in years when I just went for it, when I didn’t question my gut and when I just knew. I knew. I still know. It has pushed me in the direction of being why I’m here, it has brought a fuzzy world into focus.
This poorly branded post is about what is lost and also what is found when loss occurs. As The Beatles said so many years ago…. “and in the end…”
Love Mum
xo
