Dear Jessica Brennan,
I have written about this before but it is worth revisiting. Here is what I know to be true.
The amount of fear you feel in a situation, has nothing to do with how brave you are. Don’t mistake bravery for lack of fear. It quite simply doesn’t work that way.
Also, don’t mistake courage, for being something only the loud and proud can pull off. Quiet acts of courage happen every day, and they make an impact that resonates sometimes for generations. PS – they rarely involve a white horse or a sword.
I think a list of some brave things might help drive this point home. Here are some scary things that can take courage.
- Sending a manuscript to a publisher
- Reading a poem you wrote out loud to a group
- Going to the gym
- Trusting anyone new
- Standing up to a bully
- Doing the right thing, when it is more popular to stay quiet
- Going back to school
- Defending someone when your circle of friends is against them
- Walking away
- Making a doctor’s appointment
- Saying you’re sorry
- Going to rehab
I could go on and on.
Pressing “send” on an email when you are in trouble and need to swallow your pride and ask for help, is quiet, difficult and frightening. But, it is also brave. Accepting responsibility for something that went wrong when you could feign innocence, takes courage. Being reliable, doing what you say you are going to do, showing up. All of these things are for the brave. These character-building efforts sometimes feel horrible when you’re doing them, but are liberating all the same. Why? Because no matter what the outcome is, in every case, you are proving who you are. Not just to the world, but to yourself. You are strengthening your own resolve to be the human being you want to be. You are showing yourself and the planet what it means to be you.
You, the flawed. You, the broken. You, the vulnerable. Beautiful brave you. And that Dear Jess, takes courage.
Love,
Mum
xo
