Dear Jessica Brennan,
I am not going to write about the specific sexual assault issues that have been spinning around the news cycles for ages now. So much has been said, in so many different ways. I count myself in unfortunately a very large group of people who know things, have witnessed things and have personally endured abuse that if and when it is told will ruin lives. Knowing that I personally could completely ruin a few men’s lives, and cast enough doubt to make at least another dozen sweat buckets, gives me no joy. The greatest travesty is that I am not unique in any way. This does not make me feel powerful. It makes me feel angry and sick, and when I feel angry and sick and sad, I write my way out of it.
This time we are in, in my humble opinion, requires us to reflect on how we got here. There is an opportunity for change and for healing within the conversations of people who truly want to seek understanding. My advice Dear Jessica, is ignore the people who are right. Ignore the ones who know exactly what needs to be done and can’t wait to tell you with big sweeping generalizations. Instead discuss this issue with those who are a little less certain and a little more open. Empathy over judgement. Listening over criticism. The goal is to learn. (By the way, I feel like this is good advice for any important issue.)
We are all born worthy of love and respect, and we all are allowed a voice. No one should have to wait to speak the truth. No one should need permission to be honest, and for those who speak the truth and are not heard? The truth is the truth whether anyone hears it or not.
Courts can rule for or against, and tribes can turn their backs, but the truth is still the truth whether you are accused or accusing. This is not a women vs men vs women issue. It is a human issue.
Those who want to stay in darkness will stay there, whether it is because it is working for them, or they are too fearful to step out of that space. But those who are willing to work on moving from broken, to intentionally whole will find the answers and the healing they need to switch their light back on. They will be stronger, with beautiful power and they will be the ones whose voices reach others who need a helping hand. Their light will shine the brightest.
Let it shine.
Love Mum
xo
