Dear Jessica Brennan,
Have you ever known something for certain and then found out you’re wrong? Was it because you didn’t have all the information when you formed your opinion? Was it because you didn’t really understand the conditions surrounding the scenario in question?
The older I get the more I realize that there are at least 50 shades of grey on the truth spectrum. The truth rainbow when it comes to philosophical discussions, is actually pretty much all grey. This is why I would never excel at being a judge.
Imagine this. You are born in India and are raised in the Hindu religion like 80% of your friends. You believe in Hinduism and Brahman, and the Vedas is your scripture. You are striving to achieve Dharma. This is truth. But wait, in North America only 1% of the population is Hindu, so it isn’t true there.
Now imagine this. You are born in Alabama and are raised in the Christian religion like 86% of your friends. You believe in Christianity and the Trinity, and the Bible is your scripture. You are striving to honour the Ten Commandments. This is truth. But wait, in Morocco only 1% of the population is Christian, so it isn’t true there.
I used religion to open this post just to show that until you know the context of the situation, you cannot always understand the viewpoint or the truth of another person. Now I know Christians that would say that this doesn’t change the fact that their religion is the true religion. I’m sure I could find Hindus who would say the same.
Truth, when not applied to philosophical discussions, can be more clear. So for example if you walk into a store and put a carton of milk under your coat without paying for it, then you stole a carton of milk. No one’s belief system plays into this. You took what wasn’t yours to take. We could talk all day about why you did it. You needed the thrill, you are poor or you just like taking things, but in the end you took it. The other bits of truth surrounding this, the “whys”, might colour the ultimate penalty for your behaviour, but the truth remains the same.
However, think of a car accident. The police show up, and yes, for sure there has been an accident. It is undeniable. However those same police will tell you that six eye-witness accounts can be very different depending on where the witnesses were standing, what they were doing at the time and how their preconceived ideas have shaped the situation. If a large pick-up truck hits a Prius, obviously it must be the truck’s fault. Prius drivers are nice. People can give very honest accounts of what they saw, but no two accounts are the same, so how can they all be telling the truth?
We sometimes jump to truth-conclusions and create elaborate stories to improve our status or make ourselves victims.
The guy who had a similar idea to you must have copied you. The maid stole your missing ring. Your boss is mad at you for something you didn’t do. This is all fine until you see that the guy who you said copied your idea has notes predating yours on the concept in question, the ring turns up down the couch cushions and you find out your boss had a migraine and wasn’t angry at all. Our truth-retractions rarely match our truth-accusations.
Often we form opinions about what is true, too early in the game, or we decide something is true because it serves our greater agenda which can be as simple as an addiction to being outraged, or a need to always be right even if we have to bend the truth to get there. It is a good idea to regularly ask ourselves, “what is actually true in this situation”, because sometimes this question will reveal some of our own shortcomings that need to be adjusted in order to make us better human beings, and we all want to be better human beings, right? Isn’t that better than being that person who just lives under the delusion that they are right all the time? You decide.
Some of the wisest people I have read, heard or met, are the ones who admit to knowing the truth about the least number of things. This isn’t about waffling, it is about self-awareness and an appreciation for how the world actually works. It is about being able to be comfortable not having all the answers. Without knowing the context of another person’s experience or thought process, or having the ability to see all perspectives of a situation, the truth can be a tricky thing.
Don’t be so sure of things, that you can’t see the forest for the trees. Don’t be so dogmatic that you can only hear your own voice. Don’t be so stubborn that being right is all that matters.
The truth will show itself when it is ready, but it might not be the truth you are expecting.
Love,
Mum xo
